The NFL Is High On Crack Cocaine For Even Considering The ‘Chicago Bengals’

Pro Football Talk – New York (OK, New Jersey) has two teams. Los Angeles has two. If London ever has one, it likely will have two.

What about Chicago?

The market currently supports two teams in the sport that used to be America’s pastime. And with the Bears getting nowhere when it comes to finagling taxpayer funding for a new stadium, the solution could come from having a second team play there.

Instantly, the inventory of games would double, from 10 to 20. It would become much easier for the Bears (and possibly the other team, unless it’s just a tenant) to pay for the building with minimal public assistance.

Enter the Bengals. They’re less than three months away from the final countdown to the expiration of their lease at Paycor Stadium. During the league meetings this week, executive V.P. Katie Blackburn said the quiet thing out loud — after 2025, the Bengals can go wherever they want to go.

It’s easy to come up with a list of cities that currently have no NFL teams. But the best outcome for the Bengals, and the Bears, could be to partner up in a new Chicagoland stadium. Lakefront or Arlington Heights. Wherever. The revenue from 20 NFL games each year, along with everything else that could be hosted in a fixed-roof building, should be able to pay for the building.

This came out of left field today and I almost fuckin died reading it so I figured we should blog it for 3:30pm.

First off – did anyone else know about this? This is the first time I’m hearing it including all rumors and conversations everywhere. Never felt this caught off guard in my life.

Second – ABSOLUTELY NOT.

We can’t even figure out one football team. We can’t get one decent head coach and one quarterback and one stadium and one winning season for our fuckin lives. And we’re supposed to just add another NFL franchise to the mix? Blow me.

I also don’t want a biweekly caravan of Bengals fans that can’t let go making the trip up I-57 and ruining the roads to Champaign. No thanks guys. Think about the infrastructure first and the shitty football second.

This couldn’t be a worse idea no matter how good the fit is on paper and whatever Florio seems to think about Bears fans.

And could you imagine Brandon Johnson’s credit taking for this? If Roger wanted a 2nd team in Chicago, we’d never hear the end of it from Mayor FuckFace about his ability to negotiate and partner. The whole thing would be a circus fit for King Clown

And truthfully I would hate to see it.

Let’s get the Bears figured out first before we take on a 2nd team to pay for a new stadium. I think that’s the most sensible path forward and if any of you disagree with me I’ll send you to the bottom of Lake Michigan.