Carl – Not sure if you saw already but history was made over the weekend when Mike Tyson was knocked out in the first round. It’s the first time in recorded history to get a sub 2-minute knockout and a really big deal in the gaming community. I know you played a lot of punch out and wanted to get your take for some of the old heads out there. PS – Missed you at this Goose this weekend but figured you had it going on Nugs. Sad news about Jeff but good opportunity for Trevor and Cotter to step up together.
Thanks
Timothy Mahoney
Thank you Mahoney and no I have not seen the story:
Since Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out was first released on the NES in 1987, millions of players have undertaken millions more digital matches against one of the hardest video game bosses ever—Tyson himself (or, later, the reskinned “Mr. Dream”). Only a small percentage of those players could survive Tyson’s flurry of instant-knockdown uppercuts and emerge victorious with the undisputed World Video Boxing Association championship. Even fewer had fast enough fingers to take out Tyson in the first round.
In all this time, no one has been able to register a TKO on Tyson in less than two minutes on the ever-present in-game clock (which runs roughly three times as quickly as a real-time clock). At least, that was true until this weekend, when popular speedrunner and speedrun historian Summoning Salt pulled off a 1:59.97 knockout after what he says was “75,000 attempts over nearly 5 years.”
I love that this dude is just blabbing about copyright law to start and then gets locked in for the 3rd knockdown instantly. It’s the tone and temperament of a guy who is presently 0-75,000 at trying to go sub 2-minutes, but still has the willpower to record his endeavor. He’s on the verge of breaking into a million little pieces and you can hear it in his voice about this copyright stuff. It’s not all nonsense he says, hopelessly.
He’s working through his issues when everything changes at 1:23 in the 1st round with his 2nd knockout. This one could be special and now he demands excellence:
Don’t get excited. Get into a rhythm.
He’s been here before. The focus and anticipation is palpable. The combinations come easy as Tyson falls a 3rd time in the 1st round.
And then just like that, it’s over in less than 2 minutes. The controller hits the floor in astonishment.
Am I dreaming?
No My Lord. You just TKO’d Mike Tyson in 1:57.97 and it was splendid. May I recommend the good Mead?
Bring me my wenches
That’s how I imagine you celebrate after 75,000 attempts. You turn into a medieval lord and talk in a deep baritone voice and command things of those around you because you just pulled the sword from stone and became king. You are the protector of the realm and everyone else is loyally sworn to your service.
That’s the level of reward that comes with such a preposterous accomplishment and I’m not just saying that because I’m re-listening to Game of Thrones on tape. I’m saying that because I really think this guy should get a couple wenches and some decent acreage for his efforts. At the very least a title and a coat of arms that you could get embroidered onto some merch.
If I seem dramatic just heart me out.
I think it’s a much better accomplishment to take on an old school game in a timed challenge then to win some team event in e-sports these days. Like instead of obscure multiplayer games, e-sports should have a division dedicated to the classic games in similar challenges. Like who can beat Mario 3 on original NES the fastest. Or Super Smash Bros. head to head challenge on N64. Or maybe a GoldenEye tournament withe the world’s best players.
That’s way more compelling that even the TGL because the TGL sucks.
NFL Blitz League? I’d watch that. Same thing with the Tecmo Super Bowl League, which already exists and is FANTASTIC.
And not to just be an old guy who complains about stuff all the time. But there’s something more compelling about the competition when the controller and the game are so simple. It requires much more skill to be excellent when there’s so much less choice and control. Like football being artful for pussies and football being for the fast and strong.
Something like that.
Anyways here’s some Super Tecmo Bowl championship highlights that will explain what I’m talking.
Thanks for the email Mahoney. Hopefull you know where I’m coming from on this one.